This is just a little exciting, not many brides give away any secrets about their wedding dress; at least not until after the big day anyway. Michelle, our lovely Bride to Be is sharing her experience with us at Daisy Says I Do and I’m sure you will enjoy reading it as much as we did!
Finding the One: How finding my wedding dress was like finding my man.
It took me a long time to find my future husband- I was 29 and had spent the previous 6 years being single and fighting my way through the mine field of online dating. My friends could see the kind of guy I should be with (or shouldn’t be with) however I had my own ideas. But one day I met him and I didn’t want to date anyone else.
Wedding dress shopping resembled my experience of looking for ‘The One’- It took me a long time and I tried on A LOT of the wrong dresses (I mean A LOT- approx. 60…dresses that is) before I realised the kind of dress I should wear. When I started wedding dress shopping (and my dating life) I had a definite idea of what I wanted and God did I persevere with many bad options. I had seen the dream dress in images on Pinterest- It fitted our festival theme perfectly and the models looked amazing.
The search for the one
Like my dating life- I spent a lot of time online searching for the right one. ‘Swiping right’ for Boho and alternative dresses. I set my search parameters to up to 100 miles around me hoping for a better selection to pick from. I was 100% certain that I knew what I wanted- the perfect Boho dress to fit our festival theme- turns out Boho is not for me #weddingspoiler and neither was online dating. All my dreams of floating down the aisle in an ethereal boho dress with flowers in my hair (I even learnt how to create floral crowns) were scrapped when I looked like a fatty in a nightie.
Tuesday night was online- dating night at All Bar One where I met a range of different ‘styles’ of men. Now, my dates are on Saturdays in bridal shops and bringing with them similar ranges of emotion. 1. Excitement: Excitement for what I will find in the stark white rooms. 2. Anxiety: what if I look hideous in everything 3. Boredom: trying on dress number 15 in the shop to find out it also doesn’t look right 4. Embarrassment: when I was told to wipe my feet with a wet wipe and put my fanny away 5: Moody Cow syndrome- “that’s it! I’m fed up! I don’t want to look anymore!” No one tells you that the experience will be anything but magical but in reality it’s not easy and it’s not always fun.
So there was the one I lost my virginity to, the needy one, the friendly one, the snob, the nice but dull one and the one who I expected the least from… no not my dating history… this time I’m talking bridal shops. The ‘friendly one’ had such beautiful dresses and I had so much fun- and I wanted so bad to make it work but in the end I realised we were just not right for each other. Then there was the ‘needy one’- the shop that talked at me for 45 minutes of all the things she could do for me- every single option for every dress- it was exhausting and I wanted to escape through a toilet window. Then there was the ‘snob’- well what an experience that was- the one that felt they were too good for me and in nicer terms told me to leave. Thankfully I am an adult about it and now give the shop a single finger salute when I walk past.
Then there was the shop with ‘the one’, the man who was the one…and the one that I least expected. I was recommended the shop/the man by a friend and booked an appointment purely to fill my time (sorry Dan). The shops promotional material looked pretty poor and I had low expectations (sorry Dan). But there I found a dress that was nothing like what I had looked at previously but it suited me perfectly. It was a combination of all the things I had liked in previous dresses combined into one package (not sorry Dan). When I met Dan I didn’t know he was ‘the one’ all I knew was that I loved being with him. I am not a person that believes in destiny and ‘the one’ and in the words of Tim Minchin “If I didn’t have you somebody else would do”. So when it came to my dress the same thing happened- I didn’t have that ‘one moment’ that people talk about- I didn’t cry, all I knew was that I loved it and it made me feel great. I decided there that I didn’t have to look any further and ringing in my ears was the dating advice (bloody annoying advice by the way) from many friends “You will find it when you least expect it”.
“Your love is one in a million, You couldn't buy it at any price But of the 9.999 hundred thousand other loves, Statistically, some of them would be equally nice” Tim Minchin
The Things people don’t tell you
- It isn’t always magical- sometimes it’s hard work which brings a range of emotions
- Do spend some time researching the styles you like- but open your mind to different possibilities
- It’s exhausting- don’t plan in too much on the day except time for a post dress shopping nap
- You don’t always get the ‘it’s the one’ moment
- Its normal to have Cold feet after you bought the dress
- Consider your body shape when you are looking at dresses
- Hidden costs 1: Some stores have Fees for appointments on Saturdays between £20-£30
- Hidden costs 2: Make sure you budget for the belts, shoes, veils, headwear and alterations which can be up to £250
- Ask if you can take photos- most places let you. It’s good to give yourself a general reminder but take into account that it doesn’t fit perfectly yet
- In the end, scrap the theme- you need to feel and look amazing on the day and that’s the most important thing.
My best experiences were at:
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